TheWordless.com
2442 N.W. Market St. #128
Seattle, WA  98107
silent@wordless.us

Craig Ferguson

c/o CBS (hoc-tew)

If someone else ended up with your RockWacker, they can’t enjoy the wondrous juju that comes with until they get it reregistered.

Or do unsolicited six foot tubes purporting to contain miracle staffs automatically go to the incinerator?

Enclosed are a copy of the letter and certificate that accompanied that marvelous contrivance, as if you could forget.

May you Wack in love truth and beauty.

P.S.  Congratulations on the awkward pause.

Craig Ferguson
c/o CBS (hoc-tew)

Dear Sir:

Congratulations.  You are the bequeathee of RockWacker #8 from Melville’s iconic character.

 Your certificate is enclosed.  If you assign your RockWacker to someone else, sign it over to them and send a copy to TheWordless for registration purposes.

 Lies have been perpetrated at RockWackers.com, and at http://rockwacker8.wordpress.com/, which is now your blog.  Your username is “XXXX” and your password is “XXXX.”  Your email address is “rockwacker8@live.com,” and your password there is likewise “XXXX.”

 If you don’t change it, nefarious characters may mess around there, possibly pissing you off.

 P.S.  A few hints:

 When walking with your RockWacker:

Put your hand UP through the loop: 

Wrap hand around both strap and staff, for support without getting a grip:

In treacherous terrain try two-handed:     

Want hands-free?  Tow it like a tail, baffling your trackers:

When Wacking, observe these precautions:

 Likely waterspouts dictate donning raingear: 

Possible chips and splinters demand goggles and gloves:

Lightning danger (blasphemy level) unknown: suggest lightning rod on hardhat:

May you wack in love, truth, and beauty:

 RockWackers.com

Queequeg shipless;
Lost without Ahab.

He wades miles of mud
To where the whale may come:
To Shi Shi,
A beach sacred to the Makah
(A whaling people).

He stands poised in surf,
The fire-hardened tip of his RockWacker cocked,
Awaiting the whale.

Queequeg waits.

Queequeg waits, and wills the whale.

And waits.

Perhaps only in powerful imagination,
The called whale comes,
And Queequeg casts his magical harpoon.

Then he gives it away.

Rockwackers.com